“Uncle, I Think the Government Used My Teeth as Collateral!” – My 7-Year-Old Nephew Had Me Laughing

He said to me.

Worrisome.

My nephew.

A few years ago when he was seven-years-old nephew.

Chisom.

"...you know I was living with my grandparents in Anambra, I mean your daddy and mommy before I came to Lagos?"

"Yes, I am aware."

He frowned his face.

And snapped his fingers.

"Since last year in my grandfather's house in Awka when I came back from school, I was waiting for my grandmommy I mean your mommy in the dining to put food for me, my front teeth that had been shaking finally removed."

He shifted his tiny weight to his other leg and continued.

"I now rushed to the kitchen and showed them to my grandma, my grandma said I should throw them on therooftop."

I laughed and looked at him.

"My mother said you should throw your teeth on the rooftop?"

"Yes, Uncle Kyrian. After eating she now bought biscuit and motor toy for me and told me my teeth will grow back, I should not worry."

"Okay?"

"Now Uncle Kyrian, see the gist now o since last year o that, that my teeth removed till now my teeth have not grown back o."

He opened his arms and his eyebrows furrowed.

"I am worried, see my friend that is 6 years old he has front teeth me I have not grown my own back, me I will now be laughing in the church people will be saying I used my teeth to buy akara."

"Don't worry your teeth will grow back."

"Uncle, that is what you have been saying since?"

"What do you want me to do as it stands like this?"

"I have been praying to God, praying to God to provide my teeth for me, now my grandparents are coming to Lagos, I am sure that when they come your daddy will be surprised that my teeth have not grown since that time."

"Is that what you are worried about? Don't worry he won't say anything."

"Uncle Kyrian, I know my grandpa more than you o."

I looked at him in shock.

"Did you say you know my father more than me? You that just came to this world seven years ago."

"Yes na I know him more than you, shebi I was the one living with him since."

I laughed again and said.

"So you think I did not grow up in my father's house with my brother even before he thought of moving to his own house and marrying your mother and giving birth to you?"

He then said.

"Wait na it's not fight, Uncle Kyrian. I mean my grandpa has ba.dmouth o. He has not yabbed you before that is why you are saying this. I am sure that when he sees that my front teeth have not grown he will scream and say 'Hey, Chisom, when Nigerian government was borrowing money from China it's like they used your front teeth as collateral this one they have not grown back since that time. That is what he used to tell me and he will now laugh at me I will be frowning my face. Me I want my front teeth to grow so that my grandpa will stop yabbing me o..."

I couldn't stop laughing.